I have always found the night more beautiful than the day
Only in the inky blackness do the stars shine
Shyly peeking past the domineering sun
Daring to outnumber the moon.
Only in the inky blackness do the stars shine
Skilled flirters
Daring to outnumber the moon
Casting out feminine dreams.
Skilled flirters
The lords of day are sleeping now
Casting out feminine dreams.
Twenty-five pounds of silk slip off a woman.
The lords of day are sleeping now.
Shyly peeking past the domineering sun
Twenty-five pounds of silk slip off a woman
I have always found the night more beautiful than the day.
Photo by Ameen Fahmy on Unsplash
Written for the Experiments in Fiction Poetry Challenge #10: Pantoum.
A pantoum is a Malay verse form, most often imitated in French and English. It consists, traditionally, of four quatrains (four lines) with lines from each quatrain repeating throughout the poem.
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This brought me so much joy! I love night time so much that I work night shifts. I’ll be taking these images of inky blackness and flirting stars with me on my drive to work tonight 🙂
I’m also fascinated by this type of poem you’ve outlined. Thank you for sharing the structure and type at the bottom. I found that really interesting!
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I always love sharing my loves and the new things I learned, so I love that I passed on something new to you!
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Ooooh! The night has some beauty within itself. Being able to see the stars outside of the city is a whole different feeling. I like that you can focus more on what you actually see without all of the different distractions around. Great job on this piece!!
Nancy ✨ mdrnminimalists.com
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Thank you, Nancy! I like to think writing is universal and so focus not so much on surroundings but on feelings. 🙂
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Ace, Jaya! Quite ace! Well done!
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Thank you so much, Nick!
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Congratulations Jaya: https://experimentsinfiction.com/2020/11/25/eif-poetry-challenge-10-the-results/ 😊
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Thank you, Ingrid! Heading over to read now.
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Beautiful words, I love the darker tone. Perfectly suits that image too!
Anika | chaptersofmay.com
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Oooh this is so beautiful and mysterious and sensual in a way! Love it!
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Wow I am sitting here in the dark before sleep and this is so beautiful ❤️ you make me feel so relaxed!!
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A lovely read👁🖤
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Like other people, this has brought back so many fond and wonderful memories for me, looking at the night sky, up at the stars and just being so appreciative and in awe of it. Your writing is so beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing x
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The force of your experience star gazing comes across to me! Thank you for sharing.
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Lovely piece that draws you into wanting to watch the night sky
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I love this one so much, I’ve always been a night owl so this one brings back a lot of fond memories x
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Oh I love this one! Your writing is always so beautiful!
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What such a lovely poem Jaya, I bet when you write this, does it bring it to life, do you feel anything when you write it. It’s so lovely.
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This is a great piece Jaya, very well written. Thank you for sharing this lovely piece Jaya!
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Do you feel at ease in writing in quatrains, I mean, creating according to some rules?
The result is beautiful as usual, I really feel the magic of the night!
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Indeed, I often love writing within poetic rules simply because it is a challenge all in itself! 🙂
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The mysterious night found under the “inky blackness.” 🖤 Love your use of imagery in this reflective poem.
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One of the good things about growing up in a small racist farming town was being able to lay in farmers fields and just star gaze, I miss that.
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I love that this piece brought to life a memory for you!
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I love this, Jaya: sometimes I am guilty of not appreciating the night enough as I just don’t get out there under the stars and look up. But I’ll never forget seeing the night sky in Hawaii. Thank you for joining the challenge!
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Thank you, Ingrid! It is a real joy to join in again and I love that you connected with this piece!
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Wonderful
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